Help, I'm Addicted

I have a problem, I'm addicted.  No, I'm not an alcoholic, or a drug user, but I am addicted to stealing adorable, soft little objects.  My mommy had to take all of her stuffed animals off the bed and put them up in the closet.  I have now discovered that I can jump up on one of my sister's old bed and steal the nice red teddy bear that sits on the bed.  Let's see now, how many things have I taken to "play" with so far, besides my regular toys.  There's 1) The little pillow from the couch, 2) a bag that has shingles in it for Tracy's old playhouse, 3) socks, 4) towels, etc.  When I see that I want something, nothing will stop me.  Speaking of the shingles, they are in a plastic bag behind the chair in the bedroom.  Now imagine this.  At the time I stole them, I weighed 11 pounds and I moved "my" doggy bed out of the way and squeezed behind the chair and pulled that plastic bag out from behind the chair.  Once I found out that it wasn't soft and cuddly, I didn't want it anymore, so I just left it where it was.  Not to pat myself on the back, but I thought I was pretty smart to carry out three steps and I wasn't even a year old yet.  I happen to know some people that can't even handle two steps, but I won't name names.

I'm a happy doggy.  There are times that I have way too much energy and you could think of me as a cartoon character.  My speed could be compared to the "Roadrunner" even though I don't say "beep, beep".  My parents have a laminate wooden floor, so when I "try" to take off very fast, my feet move, but I don't.  The sound on the floor is hilarious.  I don't think it's that funny, but my family laughs like crazy.  Once I finally start moving, my mom will yell for me to come back to her, so I turn around and I slide..there's no other word for it than slide.  After I have finally stopped, I turn around and the same thing happens.  My feet are moving, but my body isn't.  It is never ending.

I guess that's it for now.  I'm going to go and find my sun glasses and then lay in the sunshine, with a book about "Doggy Addictions".  Hopefully it will help me.